Monday, March 7, 2011

The FATTEST Tuesday EVER

It's that time of year again, folks.  This year, out of respect and in gratitude for my good health--and in a grown-up, responsible attempt to preserve it, I am giving up ALL unhealthy lifestyle and food choices for 44 days.  Ultimately, my goal is to give up tens of pounds during Lent.

It's a bold, perhaps unreasonable, maybe even unhealthy proclamation, but you gotta start somewhere -- and it would be nice to have magical thinking work FOR me for a change.  ('Everything's better with pesto!' and  'One sleeve of thin mints is one serving!'   both conspired against me in the end.)

PLUS, I'm sick of being envious of the people on Heavy.  For the record, it doesn't matter 'how many people would kill' to be my size.  What matters is that I need to once again wear a size 8 without Lycra so I can:
  1.  stop feeding the Koch brothers till (every little bit helps, people...)
  2. cough up some crow,since, as I scoffed to my older sister some years ago--   'I will NEVER wear a size in the double digits!', didn't quite pan out. (ah delusion...) AND, finally,
  3. I'm sick of being so...common.
" It's frustrating. It makes me want to eat, actually."
I laughed out loud when one of the 'Heavy' losers said that last week after she was surprised to find she weighed more than she expected at the initial weigh-in.  (I could relate.)

Some of the people on 'Heavy' lose in ONE WEEK, all I want to lose,  period--but I'm thinking maybe, just maybe, the 4 to 5 hours of cardio per day while a loud taskmaster a quarter of their size shouts in their ear has something to do with that.

Last year, I made a similar declaration and ended up being undone by Girl Scout cookies.   Well this year, girl scout cookie season has already come and gone.  I've been eating less and healthier for awhile now and exercising more,  (even while watching Heavy!) so, though the usual deterrent effects of hormonal imbalance apply, I proclaim Fat Tuesday 2011 will be my FATTEST EVER.  It's all down from here.

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