Hot and Bothered

I am full of complaint.  

I just got back from bliss last Friday (see below)-

after enjoying a birthday respite full of clear water, beautiful sunrises, temps in the low 80s, no humidity, no responsibilities--it was great.  I didn't even have hot flashes on one particularly sun-filled day -- and that was fantastic! AND I actually finished reading a novel,  one from my teetering "To Read" list--  that I'd checked out from the library!

It seems so long ago.  Today I'm back, going from dry to dripping within the course of a ten-minute conversation. Though I've necessorized the condition with an array of hand fans (one for the car, one at my desk, one bedside), it is still, at the very least, irritating to suddenly be sweating every few minutes, through no fault of your own.

After awhile it can piss you off.

So, I'm irritable. And bullying a bit, too, because, well... we all have our  strengths fault, apparently, ir's justified.  Bitchiness-- I mean, ahem, even better-- mood swings, are common symptoms of menopause.  For me, for now, I'm pissed because I'm sweating and you're not and there seems to be nothing (sans HRT) that I can do about it!
Nothing that works, anyway.

My peeps suffer me so.  Thank God for love.  I am throwing-my-head-back-Cruella-Deville-BWAAAAHAA- witchy-- and I am relishing it. 
It's best that I be left alone.
 
So I've been left alone; amid Sunday housework, chat shows  and garden chores on a blessedly, beautifully temperate afternoon in the DMV (anything but DELMARVA), to find something else to complain  about.    Here it is:
Consumerism.
Within ONE hour of tv-watching,  I'd noted THREE things that I wanted to buy--and I was watching CNN!  It's like CNN stands for Consumer News Network or something.  I even  memorized the CALL NOW number for the first mini-infomercial that hooked me--

• the Cami Secret (a possible remedy for something else that ticks me off). 

• After that, Mister Steamy, got me a little--- well, no, that was due to  another damn private summer (personal hell?); I do want those little balls though...

• The coup de grace, though, was the Garden Groom--catchy name,  huh?   It looks a little weird, but it's a handheld, motorized hedge trimmer, that looks like it does a decent job--and it even collects the clippings! The Groom has got a small wouldn't you know it? reservoir, though, so might be lots of emptying.

It's the kinda thing that provides the opportunity to get a little less exercise than I got yesterday when I was clipping the hedges the old fashioned way, and working my way toward Michelle Obama-like upper arms in the process.


Like less exercise is what I need--and that's another thing I'm ticked off about:
The inverse correlation between amount of exercise, boosted metabolism and consequent weight loss-- during menopause.  All the old rules are  tossed out the window.  Exercise, don't exercise (in an act of desperation, I'd even started running, for Chrissakes, which I loathe)-- until I get some meds, apparently I'll keep losing the same three pounds.  I'm gonna eat whatever the hell  I want..
 
Wow.  This stage of life is so.... educational.  Yay.
 

So THAT's ticking me off, and ultimately--

Why can't I live some place like I just visited on vacation  -- now?  I wasn't even having hot flashes, let alone what's been added to them since I returned to work this week: palpitations. 

This lifestyle is less and less sustainable for me, clearly.

I need much less screen time and much more Zen time.   Someplace near where the dollar will go far; full of sun, sea, long walks and yoga; lots less screen-surfing and stuff to buy.

Let the transition begin.